You are Beautiful my dear, So beautiful

The thoughts in the post have been swirling around in my head and heart for months, maybe even years. Not only do these thoughts resonate from my own life experiences and choices, but also from the many other loved ones in my life, as well as those who I do not know. I only know from a girls prospective on how it feels to not be beautiful, to not be good enough and to feel ashamed. I am sure guys struggle with this in their own way. The problem today is that as women we put way too much money on how guys think and look at us, especially on the outside. When we start realizing that it is not about us I wonder how much more beautiful on the inside and out we will start to feel? I know most of you would rather eat dirt and throw water balloons at me than to hear something on how "If God made us... we must be beautiful". I know, I get it. In times that I am ashamed and feel unloved.. that is not always a comfort to me. It is almost like saying.. well my mom loves me, or my mom thinks I am beautiful. Means a lot, but I mean... yah. I think everyone gets that.

This Tenth Ave. North song pierces my heart in so many different ways. I have been that teared stained girl huddled in a corner.. trying so hard to hide from everything that I have done and thought. Wondering, and pleading with God.. "How did I get here??" I have made myself feel un beautiful, unloved, and un wanted, as well as I have let others make me feel this way. Like the girl in the song.. I always know all the right answers, the rehearsed lines, I always know what to do.. but have been too weak to try. Do we really believe that the Spirit can lift us up? That He can work through us? To convict us, make us realize, and open my eyes.. to how it is not about what I have been done, but what has ALREADY been done for me and what can be done THROUGH me. To make me open my heart with arms wide open and shout out that : "I am MORE than the choices and mistakes I have made.. SO much more". We can not do it alone. When we try we get the world of shame, and brokenness that we have today. Let the Lord heal you today. Bring on the healing Lord no matter how many problems we... I create.

Another song was sent to me (by the person I love most in this world) that has not been able to leave my heart is by Mercy Me. As much as I don't like to hear it and it does not mean a lot at times.. I am the one He madly loves and chose to die for. You are that one. He madly loves you. We are treasured and scared to Him. We are so beautiful inside and out to him. As much as we all want that from a person in life (and we were made for some of that) the truth is EVEN if we have this in life.. if we don't have this with Him.. we will always have a hole in our life and we can never feel truly beautiful. No matter how much we feel unloveable, ugly, and broken.. we are loved. We will always be loved.. and we are made for SO much more. We are more than the lies we have allowed to be kept in our hearts. I pray so much for us to stop hurting each other, and stop allowing ourselves to spread hate and make people feel like they are not loved. As long as there are humans here.. it may never come to be. Which is why we have to change something in our hearts, and realize that no matter how much people step and trample on you... we are still beautiful. Beautifully and wonderfully made. It should not just be a man who has to seek God because our hearts are so close to God.. it should be the whole world. All I know is that even though those around me have given up on me and betrayed me, and even though I betray myself... God has not given up on me. He has not forgotten the plans He has for each of us. Lord, let that be enough. Let us feel beautiful.. so beautiful and loved in you. In Your arms. You won't relent until you have it all... why should I Lord? My heart is yours. Heal our souls, and heal our hearts. I want to be known for my beauty on the inside... I want it to shine out. My heart hurts for all those who feel so ugly and ashamed of themselves. My heart also hurts and pains for the role that the "church" has played in this as well. The way so many have been shunned and thrown out for their mistakes. As jumbled up as my thoughts are.. You are beautiful my dear, so terribly, wonderfully beautiful.

"You really won’t understand your life as a woman until you understand this: You are passionately loved by the God of the universe.

You are passionately hated by his Enemy.

And so, dear heart, it is time for your restoration. For there is One greater than your Enemy. One who has sought you out from the beginning of time. He has come to heal your broken heart and restore your feminine soul."

- "Captivating" -John and Staci Eldridge

MercyMe - Beautiful (Official Music Video). Watch more top selected videos about: MercyMe